Q: my ex husband secretly divorced me in another state 4 years ago and I just found out about it here in California
he claimed when he filled out the divorce papers that I was a "missing spouse" and he lied to the welfare office in Oregon telling them I took off and said he never heard from me again so he also got sole custody of both our kids....YET still lived with me like nothing happened for another 3 years...we even moved to another state together and now he kicked me out our home and he threw my personal stuff into the street and changed the locks and told me he has sole custody of the kids. I put a restraining order on him and that is when he produced the document of our divorce in Oregon...I saw it for the first time 3 weeks ago...and now I dont' even have visitation and I am dumbfounded as what direction to go./..please, advise and also recommend an GOOD lawyer in San Luis Obispo....if possible?
A:
Sorry to hear about your situation. I am not in San Luis Obispo, though. It is interesting from a legal perspective, though.
1) Until he domesticates the Oregon decision in CA, the Oregon decision is pretty much worthless in California.
2) Your case becomes much easier, I think, if you have proof that he said you were a missing spouse while he lived with you. You basically need to show with documents (e.g. mail, bank account statements, etc) that he very much knew where you were when he told the Oregon court he didn't.
3) With this proof, you're going to be able to show that the Oregon divorce judgment was obtained fraudulently. I don't know how Oregon does it, but in general, you cannot lie to a court in order to get the court to do something, like grant a divorce.
What kind of restraining order did you get? Domestic Violence? Can you file for full custody and family support in the restraining order case? If you do, he might produce the Oregon divorce decree in court in San Luis Obispo which would force him to domesticate it. That would allow you to demonstrate to the San Luis Obispo judge that the Oregon divorce decree was fraudulently obtained. Once the Oregon decree gets tossed out, you should be able to get custody of your kids.
This is the theory. The actual implementation of this can be very involved. You'll need a lawyer. I don't know any in SLO, though. Sorry. Good luck.
Andy
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