Q: I live with my 83 yearold mom who has dementia. I have to drive 36 miles to work. Could I get on trouble for neglect?
I have not signed anything designating me as anything. I want the best for her, and would not like to see her in nursing home, which is why I am with her.
A:
You appear to be concerned about leaving your mother alone. Does she have a need for nursing or therapy? If so, her doctor might order this and home health care for up to 35 hours/week. If not, is there an "adult day care" such as Age of Central Texas in your area?
You cannot designate yourself your mother's agent under either a Medical or a Durable [Financial] Power of Attorney. A person must designate their own agent. If there is no Medical Power of Attorney, the doctors must turn first to the spouse and, if there is no living spouse, then to the available adult children. If your mother has a diagnosis of dementia, she might lack legal capacity to designate you as her agent under a Durable [Financial] Power of Attorney, depending on how severe her condition is.
Talk to your mother's doctor about if and when she needs a companion while you are commuting and at work. You not only don't want to be charged with neglect: you don't want to be neglectful.
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