Q: I already have custody agreement but spouse continues to be late on child return to me times, what can I do?
I have primary custody, spouse has every-other weekend (specific times set) and one evening during the week (day & times not set, which he takes advantage of) He continually brings her home after times set in agreement. Isnt there some way to make him accountable for mutual respect of the custody rules? He knows it bothers me so he does it more. He emails and msgs me when it benefits him but ignores my emails and msgs. I keep a continual record of: every msg & email sent & received, logs of time he picks up and returns my daughter. To petition for contempt would cost me money that I dont have (which he knows). I am trying to be the "grown up" but why does he get to bend the rules as often as he does? My daughter is in no danger but he repeatably omits the times when it is convenient to him. If I petition contempt what would that cost me? Is there a "bad" outcome if the judge wouldnt not agree with my complaints? Would that open up the custody for him to change the custody order?
A:
You asked the same question yesterday, and I'll give you largely the same answer today. You're in a tough situation, admittedly. Is he in violation of your custody order? Technically yes. Does he get the Co-Parent of the Year Award? Absolutely not. But sometimes you have to pick and choose your battles. Only you know if this is one of those battles to pick.
You've added additional details that you *are* keeping track of all of his transgressions -- and that's a good start. As far as the cost for filing a contempt petition against him, family law attorneys charge on an hourly rate: the longer it takes to accomplish your task in attorney-time, the more expensive it will be. One never knows how long a matter will take, and it largely depends on how hard the other side wants to fight (if they want to fight at all). It sounds like your ex likes to be a jerk, but does he want to pay an attorney of his own to continue acting that way?
As I indicated yesterday, a petition for contempt will at the very least inconvenience him enough for him to know that there is a consequence to his incivility. At best, a judge may publicly berate him in open court and set out penalties for future infractions, and it paves the way for future custody compliance. It will *not* open the door for a judge to modify custody at that time, however; such feat is accomplished only by a party filing a petition to modify custody.
Again, best of luck to you. And again, if you'd like to discuss your situation in further detail, feel free to contact me offsite.
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