Q: How do I get a family court judge to listen to my story?
I just had a proceeding for custody and visitation in White Plains New York Family Court before that about a year ago me and my ex got cross restraining orders so now coming back to court and the judge rereading her story on the restraining order is looking at that like it's the narrative and it's not I have a lawyer but whenever I try to speak up she would squeeze my hand to silence me I need to know how do I get the judge to listen to my story so she can make a better decision about custody and visitation.
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A:
This is a classic moment in American litigation that drives all of the misunderstandings that happen in a court and between the litigant and the attorney. Trial is for trials, and appearance is for an appearances.
Family court is not a gladiatorial contest where the loudest squeak gets the oil though it always seems that way. Certainly, scamming attorneys want to put pressure on the quiet side to force an agreement favorable to the scammer. However, appearances are either for settlement or for discovery, and trial is the time to express oneself about one's facts.
Also, it is a false hope that a judge is smart enough or competent enough to hear a story and understand it. There is a torrent of cases awaiting the judge who is overwhelmed and who wants to end the day with no wasted adjournments. The less people talk, the happier is the judge.
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