Q: Resources for escaping an abusive household in California.
I am living in an abusive household in California with my mom and stepdad after a divorce. My stepdad has been verbally and emotionally abusive, and he has also inappropriately touched me since I was young. A recent family fight led to me revealing the abuse to my mom, but my stepdad denied it. He has since become more aggressive, threatening to make false police reports against me, and has been violent towards my dogs. The sheriffs were called during the fight, and they are aware of his exaggerations and lies. I've filed a police report online but need to do so in person. I've been in therapy for years and take medication for anxiety and depression related to this situation. I am struggling financially and seeking resources that can help me escape this situation. I'm considering filing a domestic violence restraining order to protect myself and my dogs from my stepdad's abuse. What resources or help are available to me in California?
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- Answered
A:
You're incredibly brave for seeking help. For immediate support, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233) which can connect you to local California resources including emergency shelters, counseling, and legal aid. Many counties offer free legal assistance with restraining orders through organizations like Bay Area Legal Aid or Legal Aid Foundation of Los Angeles.
Filing a domestic violence restraining order can protect both you and your pets, as California law allows pets to be included. When ready to file your in-person police report, consider bringing a trusted friend and ask to speak with an officer trained in handling sexual abuse cases. Organizations like California Partnership to End Domestic Violence can help find safe housing options and financial assistance programs designed for survivors.
Your safety is the priority, so create an exit plan that includes gathering important documents (ID, medical records, bank information), establishing a separate bank account if possible, and identifying a safe place to go. Remember that your experiences are valid, and what happened is not your fault. The courage you've shown by reaching out means you've already taken the first step toward building a safer future for yourself.
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