Q: Believe daughter is being scammed; 3rd world country male has proposed to her. I think he simply wants US Green Card.
They met in a US bar in January 2020. He left for Dubai or Morocco. They have FaceTimes 4x daily; and he flew to California to see her (while she was on a trip). He has proposed to her; given her a very cheap ring. States it is custom for the bride to pick her ring after they marry. What can I do to stop this? We believe this is simply a scam to get a Green Card.
How does your daughter feel about the situation? She spends a lot of time with him!
Parents can speculate. As a parent, we can get controlling and possessive, then interfere in a way that has lasting consequences. An attorney can also do the same based upon decades of experience.
Some children won’t even mention their plans, even a marriage, to their parents until they feel that the parent is comfortable with the foreign born fiancé or spouse.
Some foreigners may try to ‘save face,’ because they can’t afford an expensive ring until they have reasonable employment or feel that they are accepted. Maybe, they fear that they will be embarrassed and shamed, even if they are in love.
Sometimes, the American will make excuses for the foreigner due to the same reason. Perhaps, it is time for you to figure out how to follow appropriate custom, but make contact and meet his family. This may help ease tensions and allay fears.
At times, it is best to trust, but verify. Some foreigners would rather live an American life, than a Middle Eastern cultural one. In addition, not all Middle Eastern families are the same.
It is okay to be concerned, but it is best do so in an appropriate way. Evaluate the facts, not your feelings. Try not to generalize too much.
One of my clients is about to celebrate their 20th Anniversary; he is from Morocco. They have two children. Her mom almost got her husband deported in 2002.
If there remain concerns, then these issues can be evaluated in the privacy of an office visit. Good luck.
The above is general information, not legal advice, and does not create an attorney client relationship.
A: If you suspected that is what is taking place, then perhaps you should have a heart to heart conversation with your daughter, and do a little digging so to speak, and hire a private investigator to check the background of her fiancé to make sure she is legitimate. For one thing, the fact that he got a visitors visa to the United States, from A Middle Eastern country, shows that he has either a steady job or real estate in his name, because it is very difficult to get a visitor visa if you do not have the foregoing. But again a full investigation by a private investigator would uncover that and much more evidence. So I suggest you take those steps if you have doubts. But of course you have to consult your daughter before you make that move. I wish you and your family the best of luck.
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