New York, NY asked in Family Law for New York

Q: My 13 year old daughter does not want anything to do with her father.

I have a 13 year old who have witness fights and arguments that me and her father has, as well as him having a baby by another women. So, when it comes time for her father to discipline her she does not listen to him, so when he decides to yell at her to do what she has to do it becomes a problem and I also believe as well as fear for her. So, she decided to move to my mom house who listens to her issues and decides to intervene by taking her and agreeing with her in regards to her not wanting to do anything with her father. He now knows that his 13 year old daughter wants nothing to do with him because of all of this. And, my question to you is does she have the right to make the choice? He wants to fix things with her, and let her know that he does love her but now she does not want to see him and my mother does not help with that. She prefers that my daughter has nothing to do with her father due to all the issues we have. Is this something that can happen? Does she have that choice

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2 Lawyer Answers
Christopher N. Luhn
Christopher N. Luhn
Answered
  • Mechanicville, NY
  • Licensed in New York

A: The court will consider her wishes. That said, 13 is a bit young for a child to be the tail that wags the dog, especially if dad wants to "fix" the relationship.

Is there a present Order of custody/visitation/access? If there is, any change would have to be addressed by the court when considering a petition to modify the existing order.

Dad's desire to "fix things with her" is encouraging. He could ask the court to order "therapeutic visitation" -- visits with her under the supervision of a trained counselor or therapist who, hopefully, can bridge some gaps and help re-establish their relationship.

In NY, an "attorney for the child" will likely be appointed to represent her interests and preferences.

I'd encourage the adults to cooperate to find a solution.

Ali Shahrestani,
Ali Shahrestani,
Answered
  • New York, NY
  • Licensed in New York

A: It may be best to have her speak with a professional therapist about this, and if necessary the therapist can be called as a witness in a related custody matter. More details are necessary to provide a professional analysis of your issue. The best first step is an Initial Consultation with an Attorney such as myself. You can read more about me, my credentials, awards, honors, testimonials, and media appearances/ publications on my law practice website, www.AEesq.com. I practice law in CA, NY, MA, and DC in the following areas of law: Business & Contracts, Criminal Defense, Divorce & Child Custody, and Education Law. This answer does not constitute legal advice; make any predictions, guarantees, or warranties; or create any Attorney-Client relationship.

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