Q: Is it legal for heirs to put pressure on paid caregivers to not spend much money to increase their inheritance? Thx!
Mom goes to hospital, and it's discovered in rehab that she now has permanent dementia. She moves home and has live in caregivers 24/7. Meanwhile, kids are looking for a permanent place to put mom. Soon after, mom's attorney says they can't do that, it was set up that she stay in her home. There is a court appointed conservator involved soon after. The kids make frequent trips and and comments to caregivers about spending money. Son is livid because he wants his mom in a home and her home sold so he can have the money. It's very uncomfortable being here and having this pressure put on us. Even though conversation pays us, it feels like the daughter is the boss. She is the medical POA. Is it considered abuse when her kids are putting pressure on us not to spend her money so they can get a bigger inheritance? Technically, who is our employer? We get paid wages and a w-2, so we are employees. I want to call the attorney, but am scared of retaliation. Have any advice on this?
A: If mom's house is sold the money won't got to anyone and instead will go to pay for her care in a nursing home. Whether there will be any money left over for an inheritance is unknown. If there is a conservatorship set up by the court, then the Attorney who set up the conservatorship usually represents the conservator. There might be another Attorney that represents the protected person.
It might have been the mother's wish to stay in her home as long as possible. But it costs money to do that so whatever decision they make, mother's assets are being used for her care.
I think you do need to figure out who you work for. Maybe just do a simple letter that isn't accusatory to all the people you know are involved and just say that you want clarification as to who you work for and who should be giving you instructions related to your job. Say that you are getting too many instructions from too many different people and you would appreciate some clarification so that you have only one "boss" to answer to and everyone else can direct their questions to the one person in charge. That would be reasonable.
Avoid speculating as to peoples financial motives. That shouldn't be your issue to deal with. Just get clarification as to who you work for and ask that there be some rules as to who can give you directions so it is limited to your boss only.
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