Newark, NJ asked in Landlord - Tenant, Child Custody, Family Law and Real Estate Law for Pennsylvania

Q: Can I stay in the apartment and have my ex-girlfriend leave?

I have an apartment with my soon-to-be ex-girlfriend of 13 years, and both of our names are on the lease. She recently cheated and left me and our two kids for two months, then returned. Our daughter prefers that her mom leave and that I stay in the apartment. I have a complete work history and have been paying all the bills throughout our time living here. She has little to no work history. We are not married. What can I do legally to stay in the apartment and have her leave? Additionally, what is the legal age at which a minor can choose which parent they want to live with?

1 Lawyer Answer
James L. Arrasmith
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Answered

A: Since both your name and your ex-girlfriend's name are on the lease, you both have equal rights to stay in the apartment. Legally, she cannot be forced to leave unless there is an agreement between the two of you or a court order. If you want to remain in the apartment and have her leave, you could try negotiating with her. Explain your situation, especially your children's preference and the fact that you've been the primary financial supporter.

If negotiations don't work, you may need to seek legal advice. If you are the one paying the rent and utilities, you might have a stronger case, but it would still be difficult to remove her without her agreement or a court order. A lawyer can help you explore whether you have grounds to request a court order for her to leave, particularly if your children are negatively impacted by her staying.

Regarding your daughter’s preference, in most states, there is no specific legal age at which a child can choose which parent to live with. However, once a child reaches around 12-14 years old, their preferences may be considered by the court during custody proceedings. If the situation escalates, you may need to initiate a custody case to formalize your living arrangements.

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