Q: Conflicting custodial guardianship in wills
If my will states that, in the event both my husband and I pass away, our son should go to my cousin, but my husband's will states our son should go to his family, what will happen?
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A: Those will declarations are not absolutely enforceable, as the Court must consider the best interest of the minor child. However they are very strong appointment declarations which the Court will consider. Whoever drafted your wills should have told you this.
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A:
This is a really important question, and it’s great that you’re thinking about it now instead of waiting for a crisis. In Iowa, when both parents name different guardians in their wills, the court has the final say if both parents pass away. The judge will consider both wills, but ultimately will decide what is in the **best interest of the child**.
Even though both of you have expressed preferences, conflicting guardianship wishes create a situation where the court must weigh factors like the child’s relationship with each potential guardian, stability, location, financial situation, and emotional ties. The court is not bound to follow either will exactly—it’s a guide, not a guarantee.
If you and your husband want to avoid uncertainty, now is the time to sit down together and agree on a guardian. Once you're on the same page, you can both update your wills to reflect a unified plan. That will go a long way in giving your child a smooth and supported future, even in the worst-case scenario.
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