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Iowa Family Law Questions & Answers
1 Answer | Asked in Divorce, Legal Malpractice and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: My ex-spouse died 2 years ago and my divorce attorney had not sent a correct QDRO form for a GE Retirement fund.

My lawyer has admitted guilt but the insurance lawyer has given me the run around for the past 2 years. My exes wife received the money instead of me. I just want what I'm owed, approx 75K. How do I proceed?

Erik Luthens
Erik Luthens
answered on Oct 23, 2024

How did your attorney “admit guilt?” If your attorney alerted his/her professional liability insurance carrier of the situation, you should have been reimbursed by now. Generally speaking, the statute of limitations for pursuing a legal malpractice claim is five (5) years from when you know... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Family Law, Child Custody, Civil Rights and Constitutional Law for Iowa on
Q: I need assistance to get my God son to either my care or "?". Crupt CPS and DHS here in Hamilton county Iowa

i am a god parent and mentor for my best friends son he 14 years old .dhs an cps kidnapped him from home under faules accusations he has been bounced around from foster care to foster care . he has slight case of Autism hes very intelligent and know whats going on . He has told his lawyer and dhs... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Jun 1, 2024

It sounds like you are deeply concerned about the well-being of your godson and want to provide him with a safe and loving environment. To address this situation, you may need to take several steps to advocate for his best interests. Start by documenting everything, including your godson's... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Estate Planning, Family Law, Tax Law and Collections for Iowa on
Q: Could someone help with tax audit concerns and potential either fraud or actual Bonds and assets owed to me or family?

I'm in a very compromising concerning tax situation this year for 2023 apparently I have been investor IRS tax fraud as a beginning 2019 tax return 2020 and 23 I did file my tax return for 23 where was then audited and still currently being audited for tax fraud and investigation I don't... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Apr 15, 2024

It sounds like you are dealing with a complex and stressful tax situation. Here are a few suggestions for next steps:

1. Gather all relevant tax documents and records, including past returns, W-2s, 1099s, receipts, etc. Having everything organized will help in addressing the audit.... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Family Law and Juvenile Law for Iowa on
Q: Are there any legal consequences if me 17M and my girlfriend 22F, have a kid?

I’m turning 18 early July. I’m asking as if she got pregnant now.

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Feb 23, 2024

If your girlfriend were to become pregnant while you are still 17 and she is 22, there could be potential legal consequences depending on the laws in your jurisdiction. In many places, the age of consent for sexual activity is 18, so if you engaged in sexual relations before reaching that age, it... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Family Law, Child Custody, Civil Rights and Domestic Violence for Iowa on
Q: I want my kids and my house I don’t deserve this he does

i I have been with my husband 15 years married ten. The last two he started being abusive and I filed for a protective order against him. He didn’t obey the orders so I left the house and tried to get on my feet starting at the bottom. I got a 1 bd apt and he won’t let me see the kids he says... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Feb 4, 2024

I'm sorry to hear about your difficult situation. In cases of domestic violence and child custody disputes, it's important to prioritize the safety and well-being of both you and your children. You have rights in this situation, including the right to seek legal help.

You may want... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Can my kids choose not to live with their father under a current custody agreement?

I have three children aged 16, 14, and 11, and there is a custody agreement currently in place. My children do not want to live with their father anymore. Are there specific age-related rules or factors that can allow them to choose their preferred living arrangements, and what steps should I take... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Jul 6, 2025

In Iowa, there is no specific age at which a child can unilaterally decide where to live, but the court will consider the preferences of children—especially older ones—when evaluating custody modifications. At ages 16 and 14, your older children’s voices carry significant weight, particularly... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Adoption and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: How can I obtain temporary guardianship and later adopt my best friend's baby in Iowa?

I am interested in obtaining temporary guardianship of my best friend’s baby, who is expected to be born next month. This would be her seventh child, and the youngest is just 9 months old. The mother has expressed that she does not want the baby placed in foster care and would like my husband and... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Jul 6, 2025

You’ve endured a painful injustice, and your determination to seek the truth for your children matters. When a court terminates parental rights in Texas, the law demands clear and convincing evidence—not suspicion, falsehood, or manipulated testimony. If a caseworker perjured themselves and... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: How to find a pro bono lawyer for a custody issue?

I am dealing with a family law issue concerning custody, and I have applied for legal aid and contacted the lawyer bar association, but they are unable to help me. What steps can I take to find a pro bono lawyer for my case?

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Jun 13, 2025

Dealing with a custody issue without legal support can feel overwhelming, especially when legal aid and the bar association haven’t been able to help. But don’t give up—there are still other steps you can take. Many law schools have legal clinics where supervised law students provide free... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Can I request a court-appointed attorney for a custody modification in Iowa?

I had custody of my children for 6 years before the court granted custody to their father. The court claimed I wasn't supporting their relationship with their dad because the children refused to go to his house during his scheduled time. I'm seeking a modification to regain custody. Can I... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Jun 12, 2025

In Iowa, court-appointed attorneys are typically reserved for criminal cases or situations involving abuse or neglect where the state is involved. For custody modification cases between parents, the court usually does not provide a court-appointed attorney. These are considered civil matters, and... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Adoption and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: How to change child’s last name to stepfather’s without father on birth certificate?

I want to know how to change my 9-year-old child's last name to his stepfather's last name. There is no father listed on the birth certificate, and the biological father is known but has never been involved in the child's life. We are considering legal adoption as part of this... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Jun 11, 2025

You’ll begin by filing a petition for a step-parent adoption in the county where you live. In that petition you’ll list yourself and your husband as petitioners, name your child, and explain that the biological father’s rights were never established and he has not been involved.

Once... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Civil Rights, Family Law and Adoption for Iowa on
Q: Mother's rights termination by DHS, child adopted by unfit cousin, Iowa.

I feel my rights as a mother were wrongfully terminated by a DHS worker who did not do her job correctly. The DHS worker and police initially arrived at my home without a warrant, coerced me into signing a safety plan for my child, and arrested my child's father. I was unable to meet with the... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on May 31, 2025

It sounds like you’ve gone through a very difficult experience, and you have real concerns about how your rights were handled throughout this process. If you believe your parental rights were wrongfully terminated due to misconduct by the DHS worker, or because of false information provided by... View More

2 Answers | Asked in Employment Law, Family Law and Adoption for Iowa on
Q: Employer requests proof of deceased father to avoid administrative leave.

I work in Iowa, and my father passed away in February. Recently, my employer informed me that they believe my father is alive and working as a bus driver, and requested proof of his death by close of business. I was unaware that I needed to provide documentation previously. An ethics and compliance... View More

Jennifer Setters
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answered on May 28, 2025

I understand that you're going through a challenging situation with your employer regarding the request for proof of your father's death. Here’s a breakdown of how you could proceed:

Employer’s Right to Request Documentation: Employers often request documentation to... View More

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1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Moving out of state with children and court-ordered visitation: legal steps?

I am planning to move to another state with my children, but there is a court-ordered visitation agreement in place. There haven't been any modifications to this order recently, nor have I discussed my intention to move with the other parent. What are the legal restrictions and steps I need to... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on May 15, 2025

If you have a court-ordered visitation agreement in place, you’ll need to take careful steps before moving out of state with your children. Most states, including the one you're in, require parents to notify the other parent and possibly seek court approval before making such a move. This is... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Business Law, Divorce, Contracts, White Collar Crime, Civil Litigation and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Do I need a business lawyer for fraud by my ex-wife?

In 2023, my then-wife, who was also my business partner, used forgery to put our home as collateral for an SBA loan without my consent, leading to its repossession after her business failed. She excluded me from business operations, withheld financial info, and misused company funds. During our... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on May 15, 2025

I'm really sorry you're in this situation. It sounds like you're facing a mix of personal and business betrayal, and the damage goes far beyond the divorce itself. You're absolutely right to question whether one attorney can effectively cover both your divorce and a complex... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Appeals / Appellate Law and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: What attorney do I need to appeal a common law marriage ruling in Iowa?

I am looking to appeal a ruling related to a common law marriage in Linn County, Iowa, which was decided in district court. The ruling is being contested by his daughter. I have 23 years of evidence proving we were together. What type of attorney should I consult for this appeal, and are there... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on May 15, 2025

For an appeal of a common law marriage ruling in Iowa, especially from a district court in Linn County, you’ll want to consult an attorney who handles **family law appeals** or **civil appellate cases**. Since this involves contesting a legal determination about marital status, it falls within... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody, Family Law and Domestic Violence for Iowa on
Q: Will moving affect custody visitation with a no car ex in Iowa?

My boyfriend was offered a job 50 miles away from our current residence, which may affect the visitation schedule with my ex, who does not have a car. I have primary physical custody of our children and there's a no contact order against my ex. His visitation is currently set for Mondays and... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on May 15, 2025

You're thinking ahead in a responsible way, and it's good that you want to minimize disruption while protecting your children's best interests. In Iowa, even a move of 50 miles can require court involvement if it significantly affects the current custody or visitation schedule. Since... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Adoption, Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Newborn taken due to past case - seeking custody options

My newborn was taken into custody at the hospital due to issues related to a past case with my other children, who were adopted out as I had substances in my system at that time. I am currently part of a family treatment court, and my boyfriend completed rehab successfully. We had a plan to work... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on May 14, 2025

I'm so sorry you're going through this—having your baby taken from you is heartbreaking, especially when you’ve been working to turn things around. Since you're already involved in family treatment court, that shows the system is giving you a chance to show growth, and that... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Would father get 50/50 custody despite distance?

My daughter is 6 years old and in kindergarten, attending school in town. Her father, who is involved in her life, lives an hour and a half away. Currently, there is no custody agreement, and the existing visitation schedule is every other weekend. I'm concerned that a 50/50 physical custody... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Apr 13, 2025

Courts take physical distance into serious account when deciding whether a 50/50 custody arrangement is practical, especially for a young child who’s in school. An hour and a half commute each way could easily interfere with your daughter’s ability to attend school consistently, get enough... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody, Child Support and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Is it legal for my ex to prevent visitation with our children despite my sobriety and compliance with child support?

I have been sober and compliant with child support, but my ex has full custody of our three children (ages 3, 8, and 13), and I haven't seen them for five months. Visitation is at her discretion, but despite my sobriety, she continually makes excuses, including who I associate with, to prevent... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Apr 13, 2025

If your current custody order gives your ex full discretion over visitation, then unfortunately, she has the legal ability to allow or deny visits—unless that discretion is being abused or not serving the children's best interests. The law doesn’t automatically punish her for withholding... View More

1 Answer | Asked in Child Custody and Family Law for Iowa on
Q: Colorado alienation issue: How to address lack of contact with child while living in Iowa?

My child lives in Colorado while I live in Iowa. For the past six years, my son's father has alienated him from me, hindering my ability to see my child. Although we've had video chats almost daily for six years, these have now stopped 31 days ago. I have been allowed to visit my son only... View More

James L. Arrasmith
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answered on Apr 13, 2025

Since there are no court orders in either Iowa or Colorado, the first step would be to file for custody or visitation in Colorado, where your child resides. You can petition the Colorado court to establish a formal custody and visitation agreement that addresses the alienation and ensures regular... View More

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