Q: My child is turning 12 in April can they decide where they want to live in the State of NJ?

A: NJ Family court doesn't appreciate parents who use children as pawns before, during, or after a divorce/separation. Parental alienation happens too often because one parent wants to gain a financial leverage over the other parent, punish the other parent, or for some other wrongful reason(s). Courts view parental alienation and verbal abuse as a wrongful interference with custody and not in the best interest of the child. Children have the right to have both parents in their lives so judges sometimes, on their own motions, request to interview children when they suspect foul play. You can definitely file a motion requesting the court to interview the child and 12 is old enough. The final decision will be at the discretion of the court and made based on the best interest of the child.

A: Although you can ask a Judge to interview a child in Chambers, it will take more than the child's wishes to determine custody or visitation. Trying to represent yourself in Court is a bad idea. Not only are you emotionally involved, but you are not a trained attorney. You do not know the Court Rules, Rules of Evidence, case law, nor are you trained how to handle a legal case, especially if litigation is involved. However, if you do not retain counsel, and the opposing party does have counsel, you will could get slaughtered (figuratively speaking). You need to have an in person consultation with an experienced matrimonial attorney, who has extensive domestic violence trial experience. Your questions and concerns cannot adequately be dealt with in this forum. You need the best attorney you can afford, do not let geographic considerations be a factor in your choice of an attorney. Good luck.