Kannapolis, NC asked in Divorce for North Carolina

Q: Is there precedence to not give half of my retirement to my ex if their plan is to burn though it in the first 2 years?

Her family is handling everything for her due to a disability. They have aid lined up for her care, but it won't start until her assets are $2000 or less. They plan on taking early withdrawal on the retirement funds from me, then using them up so her aid will kick in. I want to be fair about this, and the numbers they proposed in the agreement are technically fair, but if she doesn't take any of my retirement, the aid kicks in sooner and her care is the same whether she takes the retirement money or not. Do I have any right to request that we don't "throw away" half my retirement?

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1 Lawyer Answer
Amanda Bowden Houser
Amanda Bowden Houser
  • Jacksonville, NC
  • Licensed in North Carolina

A: The bottom line is if she is entitled to a portion of your retirement - you ought not get to dictate how it is used. In essence, what you are suggesting is that because you don't approve of how her family plans to spend the portion of your retirement that she is entitled to - you basically think you should have it. That's kind of a jerk thing to request but I suppose it never hurts to ask - of course, I would suspect the odds of your request being granted are likely way less than slim and none.

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