Q: My mom has had my child living with her for 3 years she's 5, I have maintained custody of her, how do I get her back?
My mother has had her for 3 years because I was homeless for a time of 9 months and didn't want to take my young child to a shelter so I gave her to my mother but maintained custody of her. My mother limits my contact to almost nothing with my child and the little contact I do have with her is monitored. My mother has told me my daughter doesn't want to come live with me and wants to stay living at her house but recently my daughter and I managed to have an unmonitored conversation and she asked me why doesnt she live with me and now that has me thinking my mother has been lying to me. My mother is very emotionally abusive to me and has been my entire life and I don't know how to go about getting my daughter back from her as she, my mom, has a lot of money and I'm a poor mother of 3 living in section 8 who doesn't know how to drive. My daughters father is also not at all involved in her life as he is a recovering heroine addict. Please help me I don't know what to do in this situation.
A: If your mother has no legal authority at present, if you try to simply “take” your daughter back, she may try to go to court to get temporary guardianship anyhow. Do you have any contact with your daughter’s pediatrician? Since you have legal custody of your daughter you should be included as a contact and I would call that professional to ask for a referral to a therapist or clinician so that you can work individually or with your mother on this dispute that the two of you are having about your daughter. This does not currently involve court, so the problem of the dynamic between you and your mother deserves some help, so that your daughter’s needs can be met with the least acrimony possible.
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