Q: i have a question. i have a 6 year never been married my sons father keeps verbal abusing me what can i do ?

A: There are a lot of things that you can do to better handle the communications with your ex. The best way for you to handle things is to file an application with the court under the FD docket ( for unmarried people with children) for a modification of your custody and parenting time plan. You will submit a written statement ( should be at least 3-5 pages long) detailing the history of the conflicts with your ex and dates and times of conflicts, types of conflicts, and what he says to you when attempting to address those issues so that the judge understands why you are frustrated and in need of a change. The simplest change that a court can put in place is the requirement for all communications concerning your child through an app known as myfamilywizard or similar type apps to limit all communications where you and he can share information about your son for school, medical, activities, etc.

The judge can also provide you with a specific order for specific pick up / drop off times for parenting time purposes and can change the setting so that you dont need to discuss everything with him concerning your son's life especially if those conversations end up with him yelling or berating you.

A: Thank you for your question. I am so sorry that you are going through this. Domestic violence takes all forms, not just physical abuse – what you describe may fall under the categories of harassment, terroristic threats, or perhaps one of the other 19 criminal offenses included in the NJ Prevention of Domestic Violence Act. Each county in NJ has a domestic violence organization to assist those individuals who are suffering or have suffered from abuse from a loved one, and even if you determine that a restraining order does not suit your situation, they can provide invaluable support to you. In addition, you have the ability to decide to terminate the relationship with your son’s father, even without a restraining order, and the Court can enter an order for child support, custody, parenting time and other remedies. I highly encourage you to schedule a strategy session with an experienced family law attorney who has a strong background in dealing with domestic violence matters. He or she will be able to provide guidance and recommendations to you based upon your specific situation. We wish you the best of luck!