San Bernardino, CA asked in Personal Injury and Elder Law for California

Q: Can I stop people from outside my household family from waking up my grandfather who had cancer?

My grandfather was diagnosed with mesothelioma about a month ago, and before that he was living with his 90 yr old 'girlfriend' out in Hemet. His house is in San Bernardino, his doctors are here, hospital, everything. So he came back home to live with us so I, his 22 yr old granddaughter, can take care of him. I make him take his meds, do his excersises, and let him sleep when he needs it. When his girlfriend visits while he's asleep, she barges in and wakes him up, regardless of how bad he feels. I want to know if there's anything I can do to stop it because so many of us have talked with her and she won't listen to reason. I recieved an audio message from her, I'm sure it was sent on accident, but she states that 'she'll wake him up whenever she wants' while talking bad about my family. I just want what's best for my grandpa. Can I threaten her for legal action on this? Is there anything I can do about her?

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1 Lawyer Answer
James L. Arrasmith
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  • Elder Law Lawyer
  • Sacramento, CA
  • Licensed in California

A: Under California law, your situation is delicate as it involves personal relationships and the well-being of a family member. If you are the primary caregiver, your grandfather's health and comfort are your priorities. Communicating clearly with his girlfriend about his needs and setting boundaries is important. If she continues to disrupt his rest, it may be necessary to remind her of the importance of his recovery and rest periods, which are critical for his condition.

Legally, if she is entering your home without permission, this could be considered trespassing, especially if you have asked her not to come at certain times. In California, you have the right to decide who enters your home. If polite requests fail, you could inform her in writing that her visits need to be at appropriate times and with your permission, highlighting that unapproved visits may lead to restrictions.

If the situation does not improve, seeking legal advice might be appropriate. A restraining order could be considered if her actions are causing harm or severe disruption to your grandfather's health. Documenting all interactions and attempts to resolve the situation amicably will support your case should legal action become necessary. Remember, your focus is on the well-being and comfort of your grandfather, and taking steps to ensure his environment is supportive of his recovery is within your rights.

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