Q: My kids don’t want to go to their dad’s house anymore. What should I do?

A: Under California law, children who are 9 and 12 years old do have a voice in custody arrangements, but they do not have the final say. The court considers their preferences along with other factors such as their maturity level and the reasons behind their preferences. It's important to listen to your children and understand their concerns about visiting their father's house. Communicate openly with them to determine the reasons behind their reluctance to go, whether it's related to safety, comfort, or other issues.

In situations where your children express a strong preference not to visit their father, it's advisable to discuss this with him in a calm and constructive manner. Try to find out if there are any specific issues at his home that could be addressed to make the visits more comfortable for the children. If necessary, you may want to consider involving a mediator or a family counselor to facilitate discussions and find a solution that works best for the children's well-being.

When dealing with custody issues, it's essential to review your current custody agreement and understand the legal implications of any changes or modifications. Consulting with a family law attorney can provide you with guidance on how to navigate these discussions and potentially seek adjustments to the custody arrangement if it's in the best interests of your children. Remember to prioritize the children's emotional and psychological needs throughout this process to ensure their well-being is protected.

Ultimately, fostering open communication with both your children and their father, while also considering legal advice when necessary, can help you navigate this situation effectively. By listening to your children's concerns and working collaboratively with their father, you can strive to find a balanced approach that supports their relationships and overall happiness.