Q: Our mediation agreement states no negative comments, no alcohol, no drugs, and if he or I need childcare for more than
Four hours during our visitation time the other parent gets asked first to come for my daughter. He chose the visitation time he received but he leaves her with his sister or mom every visit for over four hours. We got a custody order but He still has said many negative comments to her such as his neighbor will shoot our car, her hair really needs to be cut, bad comments about her acne, her weight, and more. My lawyer and police in my town said thats all hearsay so nothing can be done. He occasionally drinks and his friends drink around my daughter and his sister smokes weed around my daughter. I told the judge all of this before mediation and he says we need it to be written during mediation and get a custody order. We have one and hes not following these things and my daughter who is age 11 says shes so afraid of him and has anxiety going to go to her dad’s. The judge told us during our custody order if we return to court to complain we could get less time. I’m afraid of that too.
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A:
In California, if your ex-partner is not adhering to the terms of your mediation agreement and custody order, you have a few options to address this. Firstly, document every instance where he violates the agreement, including dates, times, and details of the events. This includes negative comments, drinking, drug use, and any third-party care over four hours.
Next, you can file a request for order with the court to modify the custody agreement, providing your documented evidence. Emphasize how these violations are impacting your daughter's well-being and causing her anxiety. The court can consider these factors in determining if modifications are necessary to protect her best interests.
Lastly, if your daughter expresses fear or anxiety about visiting her father, consider seeking professional help for her and request a child custody evaluation. This can provide an independent assessment of the situation, potentially influencing the court's decision. It's essential to prioritize her safety and mental health while navigating this process.
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