Q: My ex wife took my kids 10 years ago and has kept them from me and my family ever since. What can I do?

A: I am really hoping that the real reason it appears you have done virtually nothing to see your children in ten years is that you simply did not have the financial resources to do so. If that is the case, there is certainly no shame in that (assuming you have also done whatever else you can to say in contact with them). However, if you did have the financial ability to fight for them and it seems you did since you say you filed for custody, then you wanting to lay the blame for this situation squarely and fully on the shoulders of your ex is likely not gonna fly. While, what she did was likely an incredibly awful thing to do, what you did or rather didn't do to be more specific may actually be worse. Restraining orders don't 'supersede' custody cases and a less than two month stint in county lock up is hardly 'terrifying' - so right off the bat your story is suspect. While it is nice that it seems you kinda sorta wanna see your kids now at this late date, I am going to give you the harsh reality of the situation as you yourself have described it and you are likely not going to like what I have to say. It is shocking that it took you ten years to figure out that "no parent has the right to decide to remove the other or their family from the kids lives"? This ought to be common sense to everyone but definitely to a parent. Depending on how old the children were when she took them, at best over half of their childhood is already gone and at worst they are almost adults and can soon make their own decision whether to contact you or the rest of your family and your reasoning for not doing squat all about it for ten years is that you were 'terrified she would have you put in jail'. Look bottom line, if you want to see the kids, you need to man up and do what you should have done ten years ago and that is fight for them and what ever consequences there are be damned. The fact that you waited ten years to even do 'research' to figure out what you should have known in the core of your being is going to be a major hurdle for you to overcome. Essentially, if it comes to fighting in court, you are going to have to convince a judge that it is appropriate to allow a father to see children that he essentially gave up on because he was too 'terrified' to do anything about it. Hopefully you see the problem here but if not and you think I am being too harsh on you, then things likely should remain the way they are. However, assuming she hasn't already had your parental rights terminated and assuming you can finally put children ahead of your fears for yourself, what you need to do is consult with a family law attorney where the children now reside. I wish you the best with this and if you do ever do get to see your children again, I couldn't afford an attorney is likely a way better explanation for the last ten years than 'it's all mommy's fault and daddy was scared'.