Clementon, NJ asked in Divorce, Family Law and Child Custody for New Jersey

Q: Does my ex have a case against me for violating our custody agreement?

I bought my son and myself ancestry.com kits for Christmas. It was something fun to do. A gift where we could find out more about our ethnicity. My ex was fine with it. She asked me to see if a certain person was listed on the site to see if there was a connection back in May. The other day (late September) she sent me a text message stating that she spoke to a lawyer and that I did not get her consent for my son to do it. She said that I have five days to remove my son from the site because I cannot make medical/health decisions without her. Months ago she was fine with it, and now, for some reason, she is threatening legal actions. Am I violating a law that indicates I am not allowed to have that experience with my son?

2 Lawyer Answers
Bari Weinberger
Bari Weinberger
Answered
  • Divorce Lawyer
  • Parsippany, NJ
  • Licensed in New Jersey

A: Thank you for your question. Whether you violated a custody agreement depends on the language of your specific agreement. Based on the information provided, it appears that you consulted with her prior to obtaining the ancestary.com kit and she gave her consent for your child to participate to be a part of that process. If she has now changed her position and wants you to remove your son from the site, that is something both parents need to discuss and if you cannot agree then a court would make a decision. The attorney would need to review your custody agreement as to the specific language to provide more information as how this matter should be handled per your agreement.

Richard Diamond
Richard Diamond
Answered
  • Divorce Lawyer
  • Short Hills, NJ
  • Licensed in New Jersey

A: Being a divorce lawyer for the past 36 years, my gut tells me that there is much more to this story then simply a fun project with your son, so my suggestion is that you schedule a consultation with a family law attorney to review your actions and the concerns voiced by your ex.

I had a case with similar facts not too long ago where someone had their son tested through Ancestry.com knowing that the results would confirm that the child was not the biological offspring of the other parent. And, the other parent was infuriated to learn that he was not the biological parent but even more infuriated at the idea that their son would learn about it in this way.

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