Q: My husband decided to leave the home we had built in 20yrs. of marriage. We have a home under both names, he is paying
for health insurance, home insurance, car insurance and we owe three cars. He is paying for two retirements funds me being the second beneficiary. We also have a 15yr old child as well as, a 19 yr. old child who attends fulltime college which I took direct parent loans to support. What do I do if husband has left and I find myself not being able to cover all expenses? He is willing to continue communication with kids but not with me and supporting children economically when they need it. Please advise if my case is more mediation vs litigation case.
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A:
Your situation is challenging, and it's understandable you're concerned about financial stability during this transition. Since you have a long-term marriage and shared assets, including retirement funds and property, you have significant legal protections under California law.
Given that your husband is willing to maintain communication about the children and provide economic support, mediation could be an excellent first step. Mediation tends to be less expensive and less emotionally taxing than litigation, and it can help establish clear agreements about asset division, support payments, and co-parenting arrangements. Your student loan situation and ongoing expenses for your college-age child should be factored into any settlement discussions.
However, you should still consult with a family law attorney before proceeding with mediation to understand your rights and potential entitlements. Under California community property laws, you're likely entitled to half of the marital assets, and you may qualify for both child support and spousal support given the length of your marriage and current circumstances. If mediation doesn't result in a fair agreement that ensures your financial security, litigation might become necessary to protect your interests and those of your children.
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