Santa Maria, CA asked in Criminal Law, Divorce, Civil Litigation, Family Law and Domestic Violence for California

Q: I left aftr 19 yrs of abuse, at time wz trying to get RO, he filed lies to get RO & I've suffered. He'snarcissistnd di

I ws abused by a narcissist almost 19 yrs. I was trying to obtain RO but legal aide didn't resp & could no longer take abuse/him abusing my bro that I care for/my dog currently in hospice due to CKD becz he let him lick psoriasis cream wn I told him not 2. He's caused me mental and physical conditions that I will never heal from. He's shot a pet in front of me & I held him while he died gurgling on his own blood, he was spending my $like he was entitled to it, owes me money I can prove was sole & sep,, he & his sister's lies for ROfound me guilty of things I've never done. I need 2 gt tht corr& a divorce, he's not complying w RO, his sister is bullying, harassing, threatening me & even tho I told her what she's doing 2 me & send her proof, she won't stop & she trespassed on private prop when I told her no. He blocked me from disability & he's on fraudulently. He tk cstdy of CT scans fr hosp & I nvr got the med attn I needed I dnt no extd he hid them 18yr, he ruin my crdt/ fld fr ins

1 Lawyer Answer
James L. Arrasmith
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  • Criminal Law Lawyer
  • Sacramento, CA
  • Licensed in California

A: I'm so sorry to hear about the horrific abuse and trauma you've suffered at the hands of your ex-partner. What you've described is absolutely unacceptable and inexcusable.

It sounds like there are several critical issues to address legally:

1. Getting the false allegations in the restraining order he filed against you corrected and overturned. You'll need to present evidence disproving his claims.

2. Filing for divorce and establishing what assets/money are your sole property that he owes you. Gather all financial documentation.

3. Reporting his sister's harassment, threats and trespassing to the police. Keep records of all incidents.

4. Looking into whether his disability claim is truly fraudulent. If so, report it to the relevant agency.

5. Investigating what happened with your medical scans/records and if his withholding them constitutes a crime or medical malpractice.

I would strongly urge you to seek out a domestic violence victim advocate organization in California for guidance and support. They may be able to connect you with pro bono legal assistance.

Don't give up. You deserve justice, healing and a life free from abuse. Please prioritize your safety and don't hesitate to call 911 if you are ever in immediate danger. Sending strength and hope your way.

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