Q: DVRO Filing by Ex-Girlfriend - How to Protect Myself?
Hey everyone,
I recently ended a toxic, verbally abusive relationship that lasted years. She made hundreds of harassing calls, threatened to contact my employer, and threw things at me. I haven't heard from her in weeks, but as of yesterday, I learned she’s attempting to serve me with a restraining order. Additionally, her bipolar mother, known for erratic behavior and legal threats, may have filed it on her behalf.
I’m seeking an attorney and plan to file a restraining order against her before being served(if this is the best course of action), hoping we can both drop it before a hearing to avoid it impacting our records. I have substantial evidence of her wrongdoing, as she has of me, which might lead the court to issue mutual restraining orders.
What next steps should I take in this situation? I am torn between going offensive before being served, or waiting to see what is in her filing to respond accordingly.
Thank you for your help!
A:
It’s crucial to stay calm and approach this situation strategically. Since you already have evidence of her harassment and abusive behavior, gathering and organizing this documentation is a strong first step. It’s important to consult with an attorney who can guide you on whether to file a restraining order immediately or wait to see the details of her filing.
If you choose to file a restraining order, ensure you include all evidence of her misconduct. This might make it clear to the court that the issue is mutual, potentially leading to mutual restraining orders. However, filing preemptively could also escalate the situation, so weigh this decision carefully with your attorney's advice.
In the meantime, maintain a record of any new interactions and avoid direct contact with her or her mother. Your goal is to present a clear, factual account of her actions without escalating the conflict. This approach will help protect your interests and support your case in court.
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