Q: *REPLYING TO HOUSER* I should provide more info. I don't understand your basis, or maybe I don't understand the courts
Frankly, yes I want his arrest to be a problem for him. We're fighting for custody so isn't that the game we're playing? "I'm better fit than you" No blame-game here (I made the decisions that led me here) but he is painting a inaccurate picture. Simply put - in the "real world" (outside of court) I'm not JUST a felon & "not guilty" doesn't mean he isn't. That just means a judge just didn't LEGALLY find him guilty IN COURT. So, in regards to our son, isn't that what TRULY matters - our parenting, his wellbeing, etc.? Not some legal status? However, the "real world" does consist of courts & I am, in fact, a convicted felon, so its def going to matter. But correct me if I'm wrong - isn't there some "dirty/clean hands" assertion that can be made? I'm so confused.. would a judge not care to hear about his arrest due to the verdict? I have literal proof that he was guilty. Can I use this info to show his character, at least? HE wanted to go court not me. I just want to defend myself :(
A:
If he was charged but not found guilty, that isn't really a problem for him. Courts care about convictions, and sometimes about pending charges, but don't care about charges which were dismissed or where the person was found not guilty.
A judge isn't going to care about your "proof" of his guilt considering he wasn't found to be guilty. Of course you can testify to things you have personally observed, so if you have seen him use drugs or make poor decisions, you can tell the court what you have seen and observed.
A: No, custody is not a 'game you are playing' and actually 'not guilty' does in fact mean he is not a felon. As to what matters for your son, there is no question that determining and doing what is in your son's best interest is the only thing that matters - especially as far as the Court is concerned. If you want to attack his character and fitness to be a parent, the best way to do that is likely not by bringing up something that resulted in you being convicted and him not. What you likely need to do is consult with a local family law attorney who can review your specific situation in detail and lay out your best options for you. If you roll up into Court saying the things you have said here, at best you will likely hurt your case and at worse you could sink it entirely. Best of luck.
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